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They love us for their own sakes, and we love them for love’s sake.
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“They love us for their own sakes, and we love them for love’s sake.”

Charles Kingsley

Source
Hypatia — or New Foes with an Old Face
Date
1853
Local voice
Fictional character · Pelagia
Meaning

Meaning of “They love us for their own sakes, and…”

Pelagia voices a painful asymmetry: what feels like self-giving love to one person may be experienced as self-interest or possession from the other side.

Source context

Where does it come from?

Hypatia — or New Foes with an Old Face, Chapter XXIV, “Lost Lambs,” Project Gutenberg #6308. Pelagia tells Philammon that men love women for their own sakes while women love “for love’s sake” during a distressed reflection on betrayal, dependence and the absent Amal. It is fictional dialogue in Kingsley’s historical novel, not a universal claim about men and women.

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Speaker context

Why the local voice matters

Hypatia, Chapter XXIV. Pelagia says this to Philammon while speaking bitterly about love and betrayal; it is dramatic fictional speech, not Kingsley autobiography.

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